Hard-to-Read Quotations aka Misspelled Wisdom

"Thee whey Aye sea it, God put mi on earth achive a certian number of thnigs. Buy now Aye'm sow far behind, Aye'll never dye."
"The way I see it, God put me on earth to achieve a certain number of things. By now I'm so far behind, I'll never die."
— Bill Watson, Calvin annd Hobbes